Synth-Eatics
Feast for a fraction of the price (and nutrition, terms and conditions apply)In todays high pace world, every moment you're away from your work is money just left out on the table for your competitors to steal. Introducing Synth-Eatics! It's Food-ish! A mix of lab-grown bio-matter and whatever scraps left from various industrial and chemical processes, Synth-Eatic is ultra-processed and ultra-fast things with the general appearance of food. Chockfull of sugars and taste-enhancing chemicals but with the nutritional depth of wet paper, it's delicious, quick to eat, and looks amazing. For the worker on the go, it's the perfect meal to keep them at the desk. That is to say, Synth-Eatic is something is something mostly consumed by the poor and the working. It is made to be as cheap as humanly possible without (usually) being lethal first, and being as addictively delicious second. The health and well-being of whoever eats it are maybe a distant 13th'n priority. It's produced in some way or another by almost every major corp, not only to stock their own kitchens and cafeterias, but also as a great way to get rid of whatever stuff they got left over when scraping the factory floors and emptied bio-chambers. Despite all this (or maybe because of it), it's one of the most commonly consumed "foods" in Megacorpolis. It comes in every shape and flavor, but always with a sort of rubbery-spongey texture that takes some getting used to. Depending on exactly what scraps went into it, Synth-Eatics has all manner of side-effects. This is usually spun as a positive, and a sort of proto-gambling / loot box system is starting to take shape where you can buy boxes with random selections of Synth-Eatics with listed good/bad effects (which may or may not be remotely accurate). But at the price you pay for it, it's a deal that can't be beat! Order your box of Synthberries today, and get a side-dish of pretend-yogurt! Best enjoyed with a lot of vitamine and mineral supplements: get 50% off with your first month subscription of NutriSlop!
EULAs
By buying this product, you agree to waive all rights to any sort of legal action against the producer and agree to whatever happens when you eat it. The producer is not responsible for any side-effects, which include but are not limited to:* Mutations
* Headaches
* Sudden Death Syndome
* Dry Mouth
* Dry Skin
* Malnutrition
* Abduction
* Psychosis
* Lack of productivity
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